Bitter Hearts, Chosen Hearts Series, S4 416
by HDorothy
Summary: Ten years after the Ashen treaty, Sam asks Jack to help save earth. Confronting his defiant bitterness, causes Sam to admit her true feelings for Jack and to try and salvage their bitter hearts. But is it already too late?


Title: Bitter Hearts – Chosen Hearts Series, S4 416  
Author: HailDorothy  
Category: Romance/Angst  
Warnings: Some Jack language, sexual situation between married couple.  
Rating: T  
Pairings: Jack/Sam  
Spoilers: S4, 416

Story Summary: Ten years after the Ashen treaty, Sam asks Jack to help undo the past. Confronting his defiant bitterness, causes Sam to admit her true feelings for him and try to salvage their bitter hearts. But is it too late?

Series Summary: _'_'_Chosen Hearts'_ series, which not chronological written, begins with Jack and Sam's pre SG-1 first romantic encounter to present whether S10 or beyond. Please read the previous posted fics of this series. Other than the twists I've first introduced and a few along the way, this series is canon based. Really!

Feedback: Gosh, darn, don't make me beg! Pretty Please? Starvation of this writer's muse is no pleasant sight. All feedback is food for thought and well digested. "Feed me, Seymour!" (The Little Shop of Horrors)

00000

2010 AD: Jack's cabin

They'd been at a standoff since she'd walked back into his life wearing a flowing white cotton over-coat, white t-shirt and snug blue jeans. After all these years their sexually charged attraction hadn't dissipated one iota. At least on Jack's end. Ten fricking years since he had seen her natural blonde hair, thousand watt smile without a single additional laugh-line or wrinkle. Unlike his aged weathered exterior, Sam's creamy white complexion remained flawless and her tall slender curves beckoned to be held and caressed. If he didn't make her leave now, he wouldn't be held responsible for throwing her to the ground and having his way with her.

"Jack, we need your help." She chewed her lower lip.

Damn, she was hot!

"Personally, I like things the way they are." He squinted into the sunlight. "No more saving the world, just a nice pond with no pesky fish in it, and the single most pressing issue in my life is whether or not to get a dog . . .There's a lot of pros and cons to consider."

"Jack—I'm talking about the future of the human race."

"So was I."

"We're doing this."

"Let me know how it turns out." He shrugged, shoved to his feet and walked passed her. He felt her delicate fingers encircle his forearm.

"Our chances are a lot better with you than without you."

He stared at where she held him. She let go and clenched her hands. His forearmed burned from her touch.

"Let me ask you something. What does your dearly beloved Ambassador say about all this?" He saw her surprise. Yeah, just like he figured, they were still together.

"I haven't had a chance to tell him."

"Maybe he can help you," he said snidely.

Sam walked off, then stopped short and turned to look at him.

"We need your help, Jack."

"_We_ need your help?" he repeated sarcastically, looked at the ground and shook his head. Crap. This was pathetic. "So, now that we've covered the social platitudes and crappy state of the world," he snorted, "is that the only reason you're here?" He'd not intended to address their personal issues but hey, what the hell? The only personal issue in his life had walked out on him, without as much as a goodbye. He deserved an answer.

Sam's chin quivered. Dang, but he'd missed her. Bad enough he'd finally come to a point where he no longer thought of her twenty-four-seven or dreamt of her in his arms, in his bed. Who was he kidding, he thought of her constantly.

"You're bitter?" She seemed surprised.

"Ya think?" He headed for the cabin. He needed to be away from her. She stayed mulishly on his heels.

"Please, Jack. You and I were once —"

"Married?" He turned with a raised hand and stared into her shimmering blue eyes. "Wait! Let me jog your memory. After nearly freezing my assets off on a runaway X302 with Teal'c, I proposed. You accepted. I retired. We got married on Chulak. We exchanged vows. And despite our mutual morning after regrets with lies that we were drunk as skunks and didn't recall consummating those vows, I recall it vividly. We made love until we couldn't walk straight! And I discovered you had a fetish for me licking your—"

"Enough! I remember! But what I remember most, is that after the Aschen Summit you walked away, left me!" she accused in anguish.

"I retired, Sam! How could I stay when you didn't trust me, when you and everyone I trusted shut me down?"

"I'm sorry, Jack, for so much."

"Well, apparently not so sorry that it kept you from remarrying."

"You went back to Endora, to her!"

"I returned to Endora to think, nothing more. I didn't go looking for Laira. Besides, she'd remarried and had another baby in tow. I didn't love the woman . . .never did. I came back, expecting that since I'd retired we could start over."

"Start over?" You were gone for eight months." She gaped in disbelief.

"Yeah, what of it? You knew where I was as did the entire SGC. I didn't see you chase after me."

"I . . ." She made useless gestures with her hands.

"I'd have gone after you, Sam. Then again, that's they way it's always been between us. Me chasing you. Well, I stopped chasing and humiliating myself a decade ago."

"I'm sorry." She looked away.

"A little too late for apologetics, don'cha think? Besides when I came back you were with whatshisface."

"That was a mistake." She engaged his angry gaze. Not easy he assumed, but then what did he care?

"Well, we all make mistakes, Carter. Most of my life's been one honking fiasco. Now if you'll excuse me, I've got important stuff to do like clean the head." He turned on his heel to walk by her.

"I'm not in love with Joe. But I am still in love with you, Jack. Always and forever, okay."

That got his attention! His shoulders seized up with a decade of yearning and hurt. "And you know what?" He turned and groundout with a narrowed glint, "I don't give a rat's butt how ya feel." That was a bold faced lie, but he needed to see her hurt as much as he did.

Sam recoiled as if he'd struck her. He saw the tears in her eyes and regretted he'd caused them. Despite his bitter twisted heart Jack would take her back in a heartbeat, well almost.

"Don't play head games with me, Samantha, you're married to the ambassador, remember?"

"No, actually. . ." She looked past him at the cabin's log wall and her mouth tightened into a thin line.

"Actually, what?" He took a step closer, hands jammed in his front pockets.

"Earth adapted the Aschen laws and customs." She glanced at him.

"Sorry didn't get the memo."

"Well, they don't acknowledge traditional marriage. Basically, there's no legal status. Couples live together as long as they want and separate whenever they chose and—"

"Not big into commitment. But then you know all about that." He hammered another nail in their coffin.

Wincing, Sam kept explaining, "However marriages previously contracted before the Ashen Summit remain legally binding for life and—."

"We're still married?" The impact of her statement kicked him in the gut.

"Yes." She looked at him with anticipation and hope. "I'm still your wife, Jack."

"A wife having a what, a long term affair?" he asked bitterly.

"You deserted me." She defended.

"Did not!" He clenched her arms and yanked her against him.

"Did to!" She struggled to break free. "You were a stubborn hard ass!"

"Still am!" He held her in a vice-like grip.

"Ya think?" She ranted and slammed her fists against his chest.

"Samantha?" He looked passionately down at her. The sweet scent of her stirred physically feeling he'd long thought dead.

"Jack?" She caressed his whiskered jaw.

He kissed her!

Ten years of brutal, longing, desire dragged them to the grass. Sam matched his hunger with unbridled passion. His hands roamed the familiar sensual curves of her body and his groin connected with hers. The moment their lips touched, Jack's mind went numb. His heart beat with new life. His left hand snaked under her t-shirt and expertly released her bra snap. With one fluid motion he captured a firm warm breast. Sam moaned into his mouth. All these years, finally she was here in his arms and . . .was no longer his to have. Another man claimed her heart and body. Jack couldn't do this! He feared her tears weren't for joy. He'd been used. He broke their fierce kiss, yanked them to their feet and put distance between them.

"Go!" he ordered, dragging a hand through his hair.

"But, I thought. . ." She looked at him with the confusion of a child as she tugged her shirt down over her exposed breasts and her coat into place.

"Ya thought wrong!" He noted the grass stains on her white topcoat and t-shirt. "I don't care about the Aschen's marriage philosophy or lack there of. You've been with Joe for what, seven years? That constitutes common law marriage. Are you telling me, you'd trade the new husband in for the old without a second thought let alone guilt?"

"No, I, that's not how I'd—" she stumbled over her words and closed her eyes. "I'd be honest with him."

"Honest?" He snorted with disgust, "So does this anti-aging vaccine kill off moral convictions too?"

Her eyes snapped open at his insult.

"See, I don't think you stopped loving Joe. And I'm not into breaking up relationships, Carter. And even if I did, I wouldn't respect either of us in the morning."

"Nor would I." she agreed softly. "I do love Joe, but I'm not in love with him. Honestly, I can never love another man like I love you. But Joe's a good man, like you and—"

"Enough!" He barked and stomped past her to his front door.

"Jack?" She was on his front porch and touched his arm just as he turned the door's knob.

"No! Tell me, Sam, just what constitutes a good man? Because there's nothing good left in me. Having my teammates, best friends and lover-slash-wife turn their backs on me drained my humanity. So go back to your _younger make and model _and ask him for help, because this _old model_ is all used up!"

"I said I haven't told him, yet."

"Well, that's peachy. So much for trust and confidences, huh? Does the reason you haven't told him have something to do with the fact he's sleeping with the enemy?"

"Joe would never do that!"

"You think I'm stupid? True, I'm stupidly in love with you, but despite popular consensus I'm not brain dead. You waltz back into my life, looking as young as when I last saw you because you took an anti-aging vaccine. Well, I didn't take the vaccine. I'm closing in on sixty and have no illusions about the fact I'm an old man and you're a young vital woman. And now you expect me to cleanup a diplomatic disaster that I warned you, Joe, and the rest of damn TPTB about and . . ."

"I already said you were right about the Aschen. What must I do? Beg?"

"Yeah, for starters." He cursed beneath his breath as his hands directed traffic.

"Then I will. Please forgive me? Forgive me for not trusting your instincts regarding the Ashen, and not trusting the love we once shared. I'm so sorry about what we had and lost, Jack. I've no right to assume we can salvage our personal lives, let alone that we have a right too. But this isn't about us, anymore." Her shoulders slumped and she headed for the transporter then looked back at him. "It's about saving Earth and mankind from the evil of the Ashen."

A pause hung between them as she turned and dialed the transporter. He watched her swipe a hand across her wet eyes and sniff back tears. The dam behind his own eyes threatened to break. Jack's gut ached as he realized what needed to happen in order to right the wrongs of the past and save the world--again. He sniffed and then cleared his throat.

"So what you said about if we succeed?" He took a step forward but didn't touch her as she faced him. "What about right now?" He gestured between them.

"This will never have happened," she answered softly. "We'd never make the treaty with the Ashen while you and I," she snagged her upper lip, "Would hopefully be here," she glanced around the cabin and pond with a longing that wounded his heart, "With rug-rats underfoot and happy as clams."

"Pretty cliché," he said with a starched smile.

"Yeah, well, it's the only ace up my sleeve, Jack." And with that, she touched the transporter module and vanished.

00000

2000 Present day

"So I wonder why you wrote the note?" Sam glanced over at Jack as he shut down the telescope and then settled on the blankets she'd laid out on his roof's observation deck for them to stargaze.

"Beats me." He dropped down beside her and drew her into his arms. "I can't help but feel it wasn't good. My blood was on the note."

Sam shut her eyes and rested her head on his shoulder. "Um, Janet called me."

"Anything important?" He glanced at her in the soft darkness, her breath warming his face.

"Yeah, my blood was also on the note."

"Crap!" He turned into her and drew the blanket up around them.

"What if we died, Jack?"

"Hush! We're here and not going to P4C-970." He kissed her crinkled brow. "Never ever. Okay?"

"I know but . . ."

"No butts. We're on downtime. No shop talk."

"Yes, sir."

"And no sirs."

"Bossy, are we?"

'Only if it gets me my way with my wife." He tickled her ribs while holding her close. She slapped his hand playfully and snuggled closer.

"Now how about ya show me our star?" He smiled against her cheek, knowing this was about as far as he'd get with her until they were done saving the world. But after today, Jack realized he could wait to consummate their vows when they were both sober to remember the intimate details. After all, there was more to love and commitment than sex. He just hoped Jack-junior understood. Down boy!

Sam was babbling. "Okay. Well we can't actually see the star because it's in the Pegasus galaxy, but if you look right there between the Little Dipper and Orion's belt." She pointed upward.

Jack smiled as she started her techno babble. He would do anything to keep her safe, including not share the visual and emotional revelation he'd experienced when he'd read his handwriting this afternoon. In a matter of seconds it had all unraveled before his mind's eye. Jack vowed that none of those future events would take place. Ever since his download three years ago he'd had some strange experiences that he'd not shared with anyone. Far as General Hammond and SG-1 were concerned Thor's buddies had wiped his Ancient memory slate clean. Not!

He'd maintained certain abilities that had perks, like today when he'd foreseen the year 2010 just touching that paper. Trouble was, he couldn't tell anyone not even Sam. Jack wondered if Thor knew about Jack's Ancient gifts. Probably.

Seeing how badly things had gone down in their future, Jack realized how sinful pride had kept him from being with the woman he loved. At present, because they couldn't publically say or display their love for each other they'd developed specific word codes that weren't shared enough of late. From here on, one thing was for certain, Sam would know how much he loved her. Okay, forever, and above all, always!

"Hey are you listening to me?" Sam nudged him with her elbow.

Jack smiled over the mouth of his beer bottle and winked at his wife. "Always, Dorothy, Always."

Fin


End file.
